Monday, September 27, 2010

Have you been eating bunnies?

It's the holidays. Whoooo! Oh yeah, I'm so totally not really that excited. The year is going to quick for my taste. Winter seemed non-existent. Not to long ago I was complaining about going to school again and wishing for the next set of holidays. Now they're here. It's already been nearly three months since I started writing this blog and I can already picture Christmas. There's something wrong with the world. It's like we're jumping on a time loop, fast forwarding accidentally, like maybe someone's sitting on the remote or theirs some dodgy wiring. I'm finding myself sitting alone and trying to remember everything that happened day and finding that I can't. I can't remember anything. So far most things come back to me but I can't help wondering why that is. Is it just me? Or is it something else?

I think this year has been good. I mean, I went to England and I started year ten and I turned fifteen and I've been single all year and pretty happy about it. I've declared my love and found a true friend and made some new ones. I've seen a true hero of mine perform on stage and seen one of my favourite bands live but I feel as though there is something missing, like I'm forgetting something. Like maybe when someone sat on the remote my head skipped a few weeks or months and now I'm here, wondering what went wrong.

The year seems incomplete. There is this gap and it needs filling and so far I haven't found something that fits and I'm not really sure that I ever will. I'm excited for next year because I'll be in upper school and high school will be over soon but I'm sure I'm exactly ready for it. I'm not entirely positive that when I get there I'll know what to do and if I'll be able to cope. I'm far to complicated for my own good. It's hurting my head.

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