FRIENDS

because friends should always be friends

I took part in the Write a Book in a Day competition yesterday. It's a competition which requires a group of people to sit and plan, write and bind a book in 12 hours. I did this in year eight and I would call it fun. This year was a lot harder and extremely stressful. I did realise something though. About friends. I have more then one best friend. There anything anything wrong with that. There are people I worked with yesterday who I just love to be around and make jokes with because they care for me and they help me and they love me. Just because they can do that makes them great people to have in my life.

In case you were interested, this is a slightly blurry photo of my new piercing

Bridgette in Quality Comics. She is clutching the Supernatural Survival Kit and Fray. I laugh.

Dear Bridgette the same day, with red hair

teenager moment, it won't pass

I know my blogging has become less frequent and it's probably due to the fact that in order to set my life completely straight I have been ignoring my own philosophical queries. Never mind I suppose. It's probably better to save the blogs for more important issues. Not that this would seem to be a very enlightening one.

Actually, I changed my mind. Yes it is.

I had a very interesting discussion with my parents last night. I declared that Bridgette was getting her hair dyed and cut short. They were horrified by the news, basically because they reckoned she was going to ruin her hair and all that and if she hated it would be permanent blah blah blah. Which of course led to the debate on whether I should get my hair dyed or not. See, I want blonde hair. It's just a thing. I had really blond hair when I was little but it must have just grown out after I cut it all off when I was 7. Now it's kind of a light browny colour. I don't mind it, there are worse colours to have but its common. I feel a sense of normality. Father said last night that I shouldn't have to individual because of what look like, but how I act. And that's all well and good and I might be individual and all that but I sure don't feel like it. Like my last post - it's all about what you look like. You can't help it. In this modern society individuality is represented by what you look like. Sometimes it's hard and sometimes it's cruel but I guess I've accepted that that's the way it is.

Father decided that I could try a wash in in December. Just to see what it looks like. I agreed, it's better then nothing. Not that not I'm jealous about Bridgette's hair... it's awesome!

Well after the hair conversation I tried another idea...

'So, can I get my ear pierced?'

It took me a good 8 years to get my ears pierced, meaning the lobes. It's taken me about two years to get the top done. My parents reluctantly decided I could be individual and could get it done. As long as I paid for it myself...so because I'm all inpatient and impulsive and all that, you can well imagine what happened today. It was off to the city to be with Bridgette while she got her hair dyed. I had told her about the ear permission. So after we made her hair appointment we had plenty of time to look for piercing places. I wasn't at all hopeful, all the places I found online were 16+. The hairdresser told us about a place, with turned out to be really creepy. The freaky women with terrible hair and TOO MANY piercings asked skeptically for my age. I said 15 because I was scared of lying and there was the despised shake of the head. So she wouldn't do it for me. Stupid woman. Well the next place we found, only minutes later I may add, was a beauty place that also did professional piercings anywhere so we wandered in, asked about it and five minutes later I was freaking out just seconds away from getting my ear pierced. I got it done all right. Pink! It also only cost me twenty dollars.

Is it sad to say how individual I already feel? Is it sad to say that I'm finally finding me?

No.

2010 may have had some scary moments, some tears, some heartbreak ; but I don't think I've ever felt this happy, this alive, this free. I am in love with living. I love life. I love it.

Epiphany

Today as I was walking through Murdoch Station I had a sudden realisation. The way I live my life is built upon how I look. Every time a train goes past the first thing I see is me. I see my hair and my face and my clothes and I think about all the things wrong with them and I think of all the ways I think I should look like. Or just what I wish I could be.

Modern society has conned young girls like myself to build there own self confidence on their appearance.

Wear that, be her.

It is messing with our minds. We are forced to be these people that don't really exist. We are forced to be perfect. We are forced to be played with. We are forced to stand in front of others and be scrutinised. We are forced to stand and watch others mock our lack of perfection.

You ask yourself, 'What is wrong with girls in our society?' The answer: we've all been unconsciously bought by suppliers. They tease us and hypnotise us with their skin tight clothing and miniskirts. They tell us we should wear this because it will make us look better. But will it really? The saddest thing about this marketing scheme is that most girls can't see it, and most girls just believe it. Because what else can they do just to be accepted?

I have been trapped. I cannot get out. They are coming.

Life is funny, but not ha ha funny

Peculiar I guess.

Yesterday I experienced something I have only experienced either in my mind or on American films. That is I went on an outing with two special friends. Bridgette and Jai. that sounds so simple when I say it like that but honestly it is rare that I can say I have been out with friends, instead of saying, 'I'm going out with Bridgette.' She understands. We did spend the majority of camp last week trying to make more friends. We want to spread our social group but not in a way where we have to be best friends with everyone. Bridgette and I feel apart from the rest, sort of detached and we need to reconnect ourselves. I feel in order to connect to the world we have to connect to the people within it.

I'm finding this a lot harder then I thought it would be since I'm trying to do it without changing my values on life in general. It's confusing at times.

A muscle cramp...in your pants?

Miss Brown thinks I'm too sexual. I laugh at that. Not that naming this post the above at all helps me on bit but you know, Buffy.

This is the first post I've been able to write since arriving back from the wilderness. I stayed there for one night and two days and it was extremely dead-worthy. But of course, beautiful. Well I awoke Thursday morning at 6 o'clock ready and packed to arrive at school by at least 7.15. Father drove me there, and I was soon repacking my extremely large and heavy pack with Bridgette Brown. Then, after a long and laborious but amusing process of chucking the packs in the back seats of the school bus, we were off. To the Bibbulmun Track!

We had great fun getting group shots of us all on the bus. I don't think the teachers were pleased, especially when we all started singing nursery rhymes.



It is probably also true that some of the greatest camp moments were caught on the bus. Sukanya reckoned Bridgette should do a before and after photo of the bus ride. The above two were to be before photos. But, ah, we ran out of memory by the time we were on a bus again...
Still, it was a good idea.

Honestly, the most amusing moments of this camp was how much the teachers sucked. There was this MASSIVE road and they made us cross it in pairs. We all made jokes about having to hold hands and such, but Mr Brown's face (not related to Bridgette) was truly priceless. He is the most expressionless, boring human being I have ever met. I hope he doesn't have a girlfriend. I can't even begin to imagine was he might be like. That was probably one of the only problems about the camp - the teachers lack of enthusiasm. The camp last year with Mr Pilling was great not only becuase you know, school camp and all that, but the teachers made jokes, they had fun and they actually interacted with the students. We played games and made fun of each other but the teachers this year are just so...dull. You wonder why they decide to become teachers.



Another great thing was the scenery and the photography opportunities. If there was way to bring my father's camera, which is fabtabular outdoors, I would have done. Bridgette had a jolly fine time clicking away. Only problem was the memory card wasn't big enough and well...photo opportunities available were not captured with an actual camera. We both retreated to the less great capturing technology - the phone.

I have to thank Bridgette Brown for actually coming out on camp. No, not in a sexual orientation way, in a, "Lets talk and make friends way!" It's amazing how relationships change on school camps. An interesting psychological investigation I think. But I am proud to say that I have made many new friends on this camp (: It's quite sweet. Plus, that photo is just fantastic.

Some brilliant quotes came from the camp. Frances calling her pack Roger, was extremely entertaining. A memorable moment was me asking Bridgette why she was laughing and her saying, "Frances is talking to Roger again."

If anyone is interested, I called my pack Simon, and Bridgette called hers Serenity.

It is also important to note that I was physically injured during that camp and walking around yesterday at home was nearly impossible. My feet have never hurt so much in my life!

It is true, I do love Bridgette Brown.
Without her I would have died.
Everyone would have laughed.

Thank you for saving me from that humiliation.

Dude, did I say harsh your melon?

I have a new love and it happens to be a television show and I just love saying that because it gives people more reason to ignore me. Because you know, I'm cool like that.

Angel is a spin off from Buffy the Vampire Slayer and by the way it is simply hilarious. Of course I know, Joss Whedon is Bridgette's god and I accept that, but he is a genius, I can agree. But a subtle genius. Like you would ask, "So, Joss, why did you do that," and he would answer you directly but not in the way that makes you think he's arrogant and up himself and downright self obsessed because he thinks he's always right. He's just clever and knows what he's talking about and will answer your questions because he knows the answer. If that makes sense?

Point is, he's modest okay?

Tim Burton is always going to be my favourite director though. He is very similar to Joss in the way he thinks and uses his idea's but I think their loves and influences are different. Also Tim Burton I think uses more of a visual art form such as drawings, paintings - things straight from his own head. Joss I think uses idea's more constructively, and follows more of a guide line. I think Joss Whedon is more technical in the way he understands things. That's just what I've learned from them both so far. Mostly from commentary I may add. That's just what it seems like.

Well, my favourite character on Angel at the minute is er...Angel's son Connor. Because he is simply adorable. I think I've watched him get thrown out of a window by The Beast at least twenty times...Aaaaargh, and the thing that bugs me is that he starts coming back at the end of the fifth season and apparently it got cancelled!

STUPID FOX

I am also aware that the reason for him 'coming back' was not explained. But anyway, I'm not going into detail, I won't shut up. My bad...

I have a favourite photo though, And that's the important thing, although the one above^^^ is simply yummy, he he he...

Sorry, just a bit in love with him at the moment. Such is life. I also have a current favourite quote by him, final episode of season 4. Makes me cry.

You can't be saved by a lie,
You can't be saved at all